Now we get to the important part: Paprika. You can find Szeged or Házi Arany in some Edmonton stores (Budapest Deli or Italian Centre are good options). Don’t have Hungarian paprika? That’s OK, what you do is take the pot off the stove, look at what you’ve done, and toss the contents in the garbage. There is no point going on. Ponder the hopelessness of life. Substituting supermarket yellow-bag paprika for proper Hungarian paprika is a cultural crime.
“Oh, but I have the smoked Spanish stuff.” Sure, remind me to add Polish sausage next time I want an authentically Italian dish.
Got the good stuff? Pop it open, and sprinkle a liberal helping onto the stew. All of the meat should be coated in glorious red powder. Give everything a good stir, but don’t leave it too long; if paprika starts to blacken, you have to start over. Seriously.
Open a bottle of beer. Start drinking. Open another bottle of beer, and pour about half of it into the stew. Then, as the stew starts to boil, add a bit more liquid, till the bottle is empty. You only add liquid a little at a time.
Coarsely chop about three carrots and four medium potatoes; add them. Don’t overdo the carrots. A lot of people overdo the carrots. You’re not a rabbit. Toss in a couple of tablespoons of red wine vinegar.
Now, it’s just a matter of slowly adding water, about a half-cup at a time, till it all starts to bubble again. Add water, wait for it to bubble. Add a bit more. Do this until all your ingredients are submerged. This process will also help you understand if you’ve used a big enough pot.
Once you’ve topped it up, allow it to simmer till your carrots and potatoes are nice and soft. While you wait, work on your appreciation of Hungarian culture. Fiddle with a Rubik’s Cube. Go on the Internet and watch water polo. Pick up a smoking habit.
Salt to taste.
Now, you should have a rich broth, but you’re missing the final holy Hungarian ingredient: Sour cream. We put sour cream on anything. It is arguably mankind’s greatest food achievement. Don’t even think about getting away with the low-fat stuff. Sour cream should come out of the container in a healthy dollop. You can worry about losing weight when you make food you don’t really like. Once you’ve got a serving into a bowl, it’s time to stir that glorious sour cream in there.
Now, eat. And finish that beer you’ve got in the fridge. It’s not going to drink itself.
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